I REMEMBER EVERY NIGHT WE SPENT ON WEEKENDS WITH GOOD FRIEN
DS, WE DID SO LITTLE BUT IT SEEMED LIKE WE DID SO MUCH BACK TH
EN. OH BACK THEN WE WOULD KICK IT, LAUGHIN' ALL RELAXIN' AND TA
KING THINGS FOR GRANTED. WE DID ANYTHING FOR JUST THAT LITTLE
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - r u s h

three words, eleven letters, three syllables: what the fuck. first there had been sy, ruining absolutely everything, and then craig came along and made everything seem like it would be okay, only to start being an asshole and screwing everything else up. to think that she’d actually thought she could love him … what a joke. apparently the universe didn’t want soph to be happy – no matter how hard she tried to find something good, it always ended up becoming thoroughly fucked. that was what worried her about being with gabe: it felt only temporary, too good to be true. nothing could last even short periods of time for her as long as it made her happy. another down side to now being with gabe was that he seemed too perfect; cute, nice, funny, overall wonderful. she felt almost inferior when compared to him, as if one wrong doing on her part would completely destroy the image he’d built for himself. not that she would ever blame herself for any sort of fall in his good reputation, but maybe he would. another thing that bothered her was his smoking, but she knew that she would never be able to get him to stop. as much as she wanted this to last she knew it wouldn’t be able to take the heat. any time now something was going to come along to help her relationship with gabe come crashing to the ground. not sure how she would be able to cope with yet another heartbreak, sophia was trying her best to not get terribly close to gabe. this plan was failing. once again she felt that she was falling for the wrong person. her life was turning out to be a real fail.

sophia hardly cared enough about her grades anymore to go to her dorm and actually pick up a text book – she hadn’t cared for nearly three years, since she always managed to slide by somehow – and she didn’t want to talk to any of her friends. she wanted to do something, preferably something she would regret in the morning. anything to keep her from the reality that she was probably never going to end up happy. she could have her friends and she could maybe have a good job when she was older, but she was never going to settle down with somebody, that much was apparent. why not get started on her life fail right now while still in school? she was still young and it was socially acceptable for her to fuck off until graduation. why the hell not do something stupid that would inevitably get her into a bit of trouble? it was far better than sitting in the common room trying to figure out where she’d first gone wrong. but then, when was that ever fun in the first place? um … never, really. sophia pushed past a few startled first-years and climbed out of the portrait hole in a hurry, hating that people stared after her nowadays. first of all, there was the tired-out fact that she was a potter; big fucking deal, it wasn’t like she was the one who’d taken down lord fucking voldemort, she was just the offspring of the one who had. what was the point of gaping at her for that? next on the list was that, besides poppy and that noah kid, she was considered one of the resident fuck-ups at hogwarts. once again bringing up the point of being a potter, “great things” had been expected of her from so many people simply because of her parentage. that, to be honest, was bullshit. she was not – i repeat not – her father, nor would she ever be. people needed to get that fact hammered nicely into their brains as soon as possible.

for the hell of it, sophia pulled her wand out of the back pocket of her skinnies and blasted apart a suit of armor flanking the grand staircase. the way it was looking at her was pissing her off a bit. she fled down several flights of stairs, not sure exactly where to go, then went back up a few more just because she could. finally settling on a level, though she wasn’t sure one it was, she strode idly down a corridor. It would make her day if she could find somebody up to something, anything, that was against the rules. all she wanted was to cause some chaos and maybe a little bit of destruction, it would be good therapy for her at this point. it was probably sad that blasting things apart made her feel better, but it was a whole lot more productive than say sitting somewhere by herself whining and complaining to herself, drowning in a pit of despair and self-pity. yes, at least this way she would stay well-entertained. she came across the staff room and smiled to herself; there was always somebody in there, causing a bit of trouble for the professors to find the next day. sophia nudged the door open with the toe of her converse and peered in, still clutching her wand tightly in her right hand just in case.

sure enough, when she peeked in she saw a kid completely plastering the room with soap and toilet paper, a fairly muggle approach to a prank, but she liked it. it was, for lack of a better word, sort of original for the likes of the people around this place. unless you were born muggle, then it would probably seem pretty commonplace. she smiled to herself and tucked her wand away, simultaneously leaning lazily against the doorframe and crossing her arms across her chest. clever little sebastian, who bribed you into this one? she smirked, rolling her eyes. she knew for a fact that seb would most likely never resort to doing a muggle prank unless he’d been dared to do so by one of his annoying asshole friends. sophia often wondered why the hell she was friends with seb – he was loud, obnoxious, a partier … actually, he was a lot like herself, but in many more ways he was very different. he refused to commit to anybody or anything, he got drunk off his ass most nights, he didn’t have a care in the world, he was a player. often times she wished that she could live the way he did, except that it was unheard of for a girl to be a “player,” you were simply thought of as a whore. nice. really, seb, this prank seems a bit below you, don’t you think? the muggles might be proud of you, though. she smirked again upon another thought entering her mind. and what would dearest zane, the huffle-prefect say? i doubt he’d approve of these shenanigans.

TAGZ, seeeeb(:
LYRICZ, "we all roll along," the maine.
WORDZ, 1 134.
TUNEZ, "hot mess, cobra starship.
NOTEZ, this hot mess song ... it's the devil. it gets in your head, man.
STATUZ, finished.

I REMEMBER EVERY NIGHT WE SPENT ON WEEKENDS WITH GOOD FRIEN
DS, WE DID SO LITTLE BUT IT SEEMED LIKE WE DID SO MUCH BACK TH
EN. OH BACK THEN WE WOULD KICK IT, LAUGHIN' ALL RELAXIN' AND TA
KING THINGS FOR GRANTED. WE DID ANYTHING FOR JUST THAT LITTLE
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - r u s h

a small laugh managed to escape sophia’s lips before she could help herself. even though the muggle prank was a huge waste of time and for all extensive purposes a total fail, it was pretty entertaining to see how proud seb seemed to be of it. it must have taken a lot of effort to come through with the whole thing, something she herself never would have had the patience for. she actually couldn’t even imagine having the patience and steady hand to get all of this done. even if she had begun to attempt the thing, she would have gotten bored half-way through and finished it with magic. either that or she would have set fire to the nearest wooden object. then again, that would probably start some sort of wide-spread panic and that wouldn’t be good, simply on the basis that it would draw attention to herself. the last thing you wanted to do while attempting a prank was for people to notice you. unless of course they were in the know, an accomplice, but she hardly ever felt the need to involve others. she could handle almost anything on her own nowadays, it seemed. or at least she liked to fool herself into thinking so. more accurately, she was closer to a mental breakdown than she’d ever been in her entire life, especially after craig and all his bullshit. how she’d put up with that for so long she had no idea, but she was glad it was over. now she had gabe and he was better than craig ever was. sort of. okay, that was a huge lie that soph had been telling herself, but maybe one day she would find it to be true. even if he never evened out to what craig had been at his best, at least gabe would probably prove to be consistant. after a month or two of dating he wouldn’t suddenly decide that he wanted to treat her like shit, and if he did … well, she would cross that bridge when they got there. needless to say, somebody was going to get several handfuls of hexes thrown in their general direction.

she smiled and rolled her eyes, uncrossing and recrossing her arms for a lack of anything else to do with her body. yeah, it’s the shit alright, she snickered, yet again rolling her eyes at him. she found it almost impossible to restrain herself from exerting the use of extreme sarcasm while around him. that was how he was and, in return, how she had become. not that she’d hung out with him a whole lot lately but they’d chilled a fair amount of times. she considered him a friend more than an acquaintance, but it wasn’t like they were besties who would go running to each other the second one of them came across a major or minor problem in their lives. actually, she had to admit that he was one of the more ridiculously attractive people she’d ever met, but she’d never act on her obnoxious attraction to him. she couldn’t help it, really. he was so cute that she almost couldn’t even bear to look at him, especially when she happened to consider how far out of her limits he was. for starters, she knew how he was. he was a player, couldn’t ever manage to commit to anybody ever. second, she was already with gabe. for the most part. she’d never been the type of person to cheat, even if she suddenly seemed to find that she’d never really wanted gabe that much in the first place. sure, she liked him and everything and he was so nice to her that it made her sick, but she would never purposely decide to be with somebody else when she was already somewhat committed to him. despite all of this, more than anything she wanted to ditch the trait of extreme loyalty. i mean, look where it had gotten her in the past.

seb was probably a good shot at change, even if it was a shot in the dark. would she end up getting hurt again, though? she knew he would never commit to anybody, it was impossible, but when the day came that he didn’t want to be with her would she realize that this upset her? was she walking herself willingly into a mine field with a live grenade in hand? maybe. probably. most definitely. but did she care anymore? not really. she’d gone through so much and had so many problems , what was one more disappointment? she was sick of being seen as either a) the good little potter trying to uphold the family name, or b) the family fuck-up. she was hovering dangerously between the two, leaning more closely to being the biggest regret her father would ever have. maybe she wanted to fully embody that. it was her own decision who she was going to become, and this was it. do or die, now or never. tonight seemed to be the night that she would choose her fate and seal it, and whether she was going to make the biggest mistake of her life or not it was real. this was going to happen, whatever “it” was. she’d never really been the one to go after what she wanted with everything she had, but tonight that was changing. she was going to go after him with everything, even if she ended up making a fool of herself. if this didn’t work, she saw gabe as more of her backup-plan than her boyfriend. he was her safety, someone to run back to when the rest of the world fell through. yes, that was exactly what he’d become to her. not somebody she loved, but somebody who was going to be there for her when she had nobody else to turn to. it was selfish, really, but she liked it. whether for the better or the worse, all these experiences were changing her.

managing to disregard seb’s comments about zane and emily, soph raised her eyebrows. it was kind of funny how two people could be related, twins no less, yet be so ridiculously different. though zane was no straightedge he was most definitely not as out there as sebastian was. he would never dare to take things as far as his brother often times did. the main distinction between the two, however, was the fact that zane had a steady relationship, was reliable, and seb could never stick with the same girl for longer than twenty-four hours. god knew if he wanted to change or not, but it was apparent that it wouldn’t be an easy transition if he ever even tried to attempt it. at his next comment, sophia frowned. apparently he didn’t know her very well if he thought she was some sort of freak for the rules and her schoolwork. sure, her best friend might be the headgirl, and maybe she was the quidditch captain, and perhaps a lot of her friends just happened to be prefects, but that meant literally nothing. she and her friends hated – no, despised – the rules and had never complied to them, ever. she had never felt so strongly the urge to defend and prove herself to anyone else than she did now to him. of all people, she was defending her personality to sebastian thomas. she frowned and crossed her arms back over her chest before noting dully, as if i give a fuck about bonus points? i haven’t touched my homework in at least a month now. she also felt the urge to toss in afterwards, and might i add that we’re in the same year? i’m hardly a ‘kiddo.’ the term actually sort of disgusted her. being reminded that she was inferior to anyone in any way, especially in age, made her just want to throw something or break things. she hated feeling that she was below somebody.

TAGZ, seeeeb(:
LYRICZ, "we all roll along," the maine.
WORDZ, 1 330.
TUNEZ, "maneater," panic! at the disco.
NOTEZ, ewh, this post is so gay. enjoy :p and i actually like seb a wee bit, he's fascinating.
STATUZ, finished.